el rostro de la ciudad urbana que ella no quiere que veas

For quite sometime I've been seeing the same señora wandering around Irrarrazaval and Chile-España. I saw her on a bus once, crouched in the corner of the bus with people distancing themselves from her because she smelled like she hadn't showered in a long time. With her hole-saturated plastic bag holding her old old water bottle, with plastic bags of something, and a blue paragua sticking out, here stood this little woman of probably less than 5 feet, whom I later found out was 90 years old. Dressed in layers of shirts and a dark woolen jacket, skirt covered in dirt from sitting on the trash-littered streets of santiago and blacked from the accumaltion of dirty air. Her grey and white hair braided together with tangled pieces of hair ties. Her mouth was suken in for lack of teeth. Her face was weathered and tan, full of wrinkles and age. Her eyelids dropped concealing her clear blue eyes, her lashes sticking together from the liquid her eyes were producing. To see she always had to tilt her head back to see the people staring at her, ignoring her, and or dropping money in her little cardboard box. She always is sitting down, and because of her small size and her position, typical of any urban landscape, she is often missed or ignored. The times I've seen her I've wanted so bad to talk to her, but I would either be on the way to class or in a group of people herding around. But I also had the fear that I wouldn't be able to communicate very well with her because of my limited Spanish and my limited comprehension.

Finally today God created an opportunity. I woke up contemplating not to go to my "early" class today, but I was prompted by some unknown willpower to get out of my bed, get ready, and go to class. Seeing the bus al lado de mi, I jogged to the bus stop right when the bus stopped to pick people up. I ran on. Sped walk to class, onto campus, and into the room.. where no one was there except for my gringo compañero de clase. After waiting around a bit we decided that there was no class since even the normally punctual professor didn't show up. I left a bit bummed because I could have slept in. But God had other plans.

I planned to go to my other class on another campus across Santiago really early, but when I got off the micro to change buses, I saw her right in fron of the stop. I had an hour or so before the I need to go to class. I saw a lady give her some coins. After standng for a little watching the lady give her coins and while I was looking up a word in my Spanish-English dictionary (I do that a lot), I walked up to her and introduced myself and sat down next to her. I handed her some money and started talking to her. Asked her how long she had been out here. 6 or 8 years. I asked her were she was from originally, and I think she said Argentina. She had an accent. But she was also hard to understand because she had no teeth. She started talking and talking. They just want you to listen y nada mas. What really broke my heart was when she said that she was going to die like a dog on the streets. That she was no one and no one would notice her when when she died. I tried to tell here that she was a somebody. Even though I only understood maybe 60 percent of what she said, I grasped that she had family in Buenos Aires and in Cartagena, Chile. I asked, "a Ud. se le echaron?", and she said "si, por viejo". I realized how tragic the trend of people in such situations has been. That they've been essentially thrown out of the homes of their children and relatives because they've become a so-called burden. She had been working here and there, but at 90 years old she was in no shape to work anymore. She had a hunchback, her eyes were closing shut, she had no teeth and was unable to speak very clearly. She still had a sharp mind though.

Another thing that caught my attention was that she said that she was going to go buy some bread. But I asked her, le cuesta comerlo? and she said yes, but what else could she buy? Soup or any other food that is more liquidy and soft would cost too much. I can't imagine how hard it is for someone without teeth to eat bread. I wanted to so bad to make her soup or some sort of food that would be easier for her to eat. Hopefully I will be able to do that. It was a relatively short time of talking with her, but it brought me back to reality once again, and again God tugged my heart telling me to never forget them.

She was set on getting up and getting herself a drink so I despedired myself. I walked but looked back and saw her get up slowly and waddle lentamente towards another direction with her broken bag in the midst of the fast-paced people of Santiago. Later seeing a massively fat dog and its owner, I thought to myself how sad and messed up this world could be.

La vida es.

My time here so far has been like a good book. I've been so captivated by life here that I'm not realizing that the book's ending pretty soon. I've got about 2 months left here and it shall be a quick but very busy 2 months. I wish I had updated more frequently, but now I feel like I've gotten to a point where it would be too hard to detail out everything that's been going on here.

So I'm going to ramble and see where this goes.

1) I''m quite shocked at how much I've improved in understanding (and hopefully in speaking/reading/writing as well) Spanish. I came here feel ridiculously stupid and unable to communicate, and now I'm feeling pretty comfortable with my broken Spanish. I have so many moments of delayed understanding, but for the most part, I can understand maybe 85% of what I hear. Of course this depends on the context. But Praise God for this. I 'm really happy that I have this new tool that God's granted me to use ... in life! Language is such a frustrating, but absolutely beautiful thing.

2) The friendships I have made here have been inolvidable (unforgettable). Once again, God's provided people for me to confide in, to share this wonderful experience with, to travel with, to live with, to worship and pray with... I'm so astounded by where I'm at. And I can never never attribute anything I did to this gift so given by God. I can firmly say that I love the people here, both Chileans that I know, and my fellow gringos I know. Although I'm not a very cariñosa person (I think?) I truly appreciate the frienships God's given me. Muchas gracias a Uds. y aun más a Dios.

3) I went "out" dancing for the first time in Santiago. I guess you could call it "carreteando" (sort of means partying). But it was with a great group who didn't get wasted.. nor did we grind to reggaeton. Rather, sino, we grooved to 80's music at a club called Sala Uno. It was.. at least according to Garrett, the wierdet club ever, but it was fun grooving in the not so fun smokey building. There were so ridiculous strobe-light disco-ball action acompanied by a big screen featuring music videos of all the songs people were dancing to. Chileans, at least según what I saw, are funny dancers. They're not too crazy... so I guess me, Garrett, and Mateo stood out a bit. JAJA. Yes all. I can groove. In my own way of course. But I will not groove for you because you will laugh at me. I went out with my new apartmentmate, Paola, quien felt a bit out of place because she's in her 30's, but after Carlitos y others came it wasn't as strange for her. We fueled up with choripan completos (delicious Chilean hotdogs)... and fueled up afterwards with sopaipillas (fried pumpkin dough with salsa!).. and some of the Chileans/Bolivians fueled up on cowstomach-on-a-bun... tasted like fish and had texture like rubber. gag . But in general, street food always tastes delicious. And food always tastes delicious late at night/ morning. So in sum, it was really delicious. =)

4) My internet was going nuts for a long time. I had it installed in the apartment because at first, to my dismay, I found out that there was no internet!! So VTR, the cable company, installed it and all was dandy.. for 30 minutes. Then it started cutting in and out. And finally it completely cut out... I called the VTR help line so many times I'm sure they were familiar with my name and gringo accent. I learned a new trade: talking on the phone. Phone conversations in Spanish always leave me super sweaty and red from embarrassment. Finally the tech man came (after another had come to try to fix it) and we had to get on the roof because thats where the other guy said the problem was it. Turns out the cable needed to be replaced... so the poor cable guy had to walk down to his truck and haul a new cable up again. ( I don't have elevators in my apartment.. even though it's only 4 floors). While he was working hard in what he knew best, I was acting like a little kiddo running around on the rooftops, climbing around, admiring the beautiful view of Santiago and the cerros.. and the melting snow-capped mountains in el fondo. I don't know why, but that was an exhilarating moment for me. I tell you, all my super happy moments have been in the most simplest of times.

5) I got a prueba back Monday. I didn't do that great. But my professor graciously gave me and the other gringa... get this... "points for effort". I nearly burst out laughing in class. I don't know why I thought it was so funny. But I guess it reminds me of elementary school, or times that people always joke about that. But lo and behold, I actually got points for effort for trying to answer in Spanish. Who knew a professor would actually do something like that. That was seriously so kind of her. But I feel a bit aprehensive handing this test to my department asking them to approve of this course... jajaja.

6) I miss people in the U.S. but I feel sad that I'm going to leave soon. So. How does one reconcile such feelings? Idurner.

7) I'm already trying to think of what I'm going to do with this blog when I come back. I think I'm going to convert it into a Spanish blog for Chileans... or gringos that want to read what I'm doing in life.. in the EEUU. Plus, even if no one reads it, it would be good practice for me?

doodadoodadoodoo

I'm sitting in a cafe eating cuchuen de manzana and drinking a batido chirimoya. My real intentions were to steal their WiFi because my internet is really not cooperating with me.

But my life in Chile right now:

1) It's getting hot in here. And we've got no ozone. So. We've got some wonderful burning of the skin action and sweaty pores. I enjoy the weather, but it's going to start getting unbearable I think. San Diego spoiled me way too much.

2) I'm only here for 2 more months !! Where on earth did time go?! School is already ending in a month and the tickets to Patagonia have been bought. Before I know it, I'll be back in the EEUU wondering if I really really was in Chile for 6 months. Crazy.

3) I'm totally just enjoying God's presence and joy that He's given me. Like Garrett's said, life is meant to be lived slowly, without anxiety and stress always gripping our hearts. God is good. That's all I can really say right now. God is so good to me.

4) I feel like I can only do a long update when I'm couped up in my room and not in a smokey cafe.. so I promise as soon as I get internet in my apartment a long, reflective, picture-filled update will come. =)

Que Dios les bendiga!!



(photo taken by Emily Pulley)

noche del debate y partido.

Esta noche estaba llena de cosas. El gran partido entre Chile y Argentina ("enemigos desde siempre" jaja) y el debate presidencial final entre Obama y McCain. Ambos fueron muy intensos. Pues. Chile ganó.. y ahora toda la gente está celebrando sonando sus horns de sus autos.. me recuerda de Francia y el partido final de la Copa Mundial dos años atrás. locura te digo. Supuestamente Chile no había ganado contra Argentina desde como treinta y tanto años atrás por lo tanto esta noche es un gran evento.

ahh debo empezar mi informe para mañana. pero la verdad es que estoy super floja ahora y solamente estoy interesada en el analysis de los debates ahora. ahh Dios dame la voluntad para hacerlo!!

la mudanza y el monte

1) I moved ... and my room is small and cute. and I thank the Lord so much for this place.


2) My shoes are dying.
3) We went to El Monte... and hour out of Santiago.. to el campo (the rural lands of Chile). Rural tourism with a wonderfully kind and generous man, Pedro, and a sweet and lovely lady named Teresa. They're alfajore/chocolate makers!!! Without knowing what to expect really, we went to El Monte and met up with these alfajore makers that we met in la fonda for el dieciocho. They're part of a committee that tries to bring tourists to this historically important pueblo... and this beauitful rural getaway. Today we learned so much about.. just so many things. By the end of the day us three could just not stop smiling. Everything was beautiful, the weather was perfect, Pedro and Teresa's knowledge and hospitality completely astounded us. We went home with super happy hearts, flowers, and bags of alfajores. God is so good to us. WHAAA.


















"There is one who makes himself rich, yet has nothing;
And the one who makes himself poor, yet has great riches."

Proverbs 13:7

internet-less

So. I moved into my new apartment and I`m internetless. Updates shall come soon. But I´m happy and God as usual is doing amazing things.